Overwhelmed

I don't get overwhelmed much as a mom, especially as a mom to twins, but here lately I am. And not for the reasons one might think. Yes, I cannot take my eyes off them for two seconds or they will be in the dog bowl and yes, it's an extra 30 minutes added on to our morning getting two boys ready and yes, they cry at the same time. But those things are easy. Those things make our life fun and unpredictable. What I am overwhelmed with is this constant sickness. Over the past few months both kids have been constantly sick. I'm talking MAYBE one week out of the month do they feel good. We have constant ear infections, constant runny noses, constant coughs, which means constant throwing up. It's one of those times as a mom you are completely helpless. You can't do anything to make your babies feel better or make it go away. I lay in my bed at night with tears streaming down my face because all I can hear is my poor babies coughing their heads off and trying to breathe through all the snot. I have been feeling this extreme guilt for working lately. Sending them to daycare is what is getting them sick. I just want to be able to take off one month so they can stay home and get healthy. We don't get to enjoy them and they don't get to enjoy life. I know that sounds dramatic, but that's how I feel. I feel like I'm missing out on our babies growing up because all they want to do is lay around or sleep. They are always fussy because they don't get any sleep at night. And just when we feel like we have them sleep trained AGAIN, bam another sickness hits. This also means we don't get any sleep. Which is fine. I'd rather cuddle my little boys anyday when they are sick, but at some point we need that sleep to function. It's gets exhausting. Not to mention I am now taking leave without pay. And that is still with our family members helping out as much as they can. This is another guilt. I am their mother and I can't even take off as much as I'd like to care for them. We are also paying a large amount of money for a daycare they can't even attend more than 2 days a week. I hate these feelings that I am having. I guess I'll just keep holding out for that 1st birthday. That's when every tells me it gets better. Until then pray for this momma, because I'm overwhelmed!





Well I was going to upload some pics, but apparently I have become computer illiterate. They are all sideways now and wont turn. I'll figure it out soon :)

Month 9

Here we are again.  Another month down.  Can someone please tell time to go slower!  The boys are growing and learning like crazy.  I realize that all the things they learn are part of their development, but I seriously can't help but be one proud momma.  They are so smart and are doing things before the average age.  Not trying to brag, but I just really worried about this with them being twins and born at 37.4 weeks.  You know, because the world tries to scare you with that nonsense.  Anyway, poo on you people because our boys are strong, healthy and brilliant!

Beckham

Weight 15lbs 13oz (2%)
Length 27.5 in (21%)
Head 17.5 in (37%)
Milestones:  Says Dada, Mama, Buba, Nana.  This kid is verbally advanced :)  Pulls up on anything and everything, but gets stuck and doesn't know how to get down. It's pretty dang cute.  He now gives me open mouth kisses.  He is still just the most laid back little guy. He has been really laughing lately.  He will get his little giggle box turned on and you could just do about anything and he will think you are the funniest person in the world.  He has started doing this thing where he crawls towards something and opens his mouth like he is going to attack it like a monster.  So cute!!!!!  He has one tooth.  Working on another.

Brody

Weight 16lbs 11oz (8%)
Length 27.5 in (21%)
Head 17 in (8%)
Milestones: Still just says Dada (non-stop).  He loves to scream!  He pulls up on anything and everything and has recently started leaning back while holding on.  Then just lets go to bounce on his bottom.  It's hilarious.  He loves doing it in his crib because he bounces. He shakes his head no. We think this is cute now, but probably wont in a few months.  He plays patty cake and he still loves to give his momma kisses.  This little turd had an attitude and is seriously going to be a handful.  He knows what he wants and he is determined to have it his way.  He bullies his little (big) brother.  Constantly stealing his paci and bottle.  He will crawl right over him like he isn't even there.  This is probably why this kid knows no already.  He gets told it often.  He has one tooth. Working on another.

Both boys are just really taking off growing developmentally.  It's so amazing to be a part of watching this every day.  Sometimes I feel like I need to pinch myself to know this is real.  I really finally am a mom.  And not just a mom.  One of the most blessed moms in the world with TWO amazing baby boys.  I got my pregnancy journal out the other day.  I was looking at old ultrasound pics and reading my comments about the boys in my stomach.  We got a good laugh because I had written how Brody was always wanting to pose for the camera and Beckham would be shy and turn his head.  It's amazing because that is kind of how it is.  I sit in disbelief that they went from the tiny little peanuts in my belly to what they are today.  They haven't been sleeping that great at night, but I think their teeth bother them.  I finally put blankets in there with them and it has definitely helped Beckham.  He loves to feel things.  We have tried some new foods.  They have had crackers, cheese puffs, cheese, fries, pizza (bread), and pancakes.  I'm slowly working out my fear on this.  1st birthday planning is in full force.  I'm probably going way overboard, but I just can't help it.  They only turn 1 once!  I just can't believe it's only 3 months away.

Happy 9 months to the most incredibly precious little boys in the world.  Momma loves you more than I will ever be able to express.  You have filled my heart!

 You'll have to excuse the sideways pic. It wouldn't allow me to save it the correct direction.

 We finally found some umbrella strollers.  I didn't realize these things were so hard to come by these days.  This sure is easier than the oversized limo.

My Boys Grew Up a Little More

This weekend was kind of a big weekend at our household. Well in baby milestone terms anyways. Both boys pulled up by themselves for the first time. They both took steps by themselves on their walker. And little Mr. Beckham got his first tooth. We knew something was off with him because he just really wasn't interested in eating much last week and all weekend he would not let us put him down. He would be out cold and the second he hit his bed it was pure terror like the worst thing in the world just happened. I decided Sunday morning to stick my finger in his mouth and there it was. The sharp little tooth poking its way through. Brody now has a white spec on his gums so I'm assuming his will be coming through any day. They are everywhere now. We literally cannot take our eyes off of them for two seconds. We are currently searching for a round gate. If you think it's torture, I challenge you to come watch them for an hour :) They are getting so much fun. Really setting in to their own personalities. I think Brody will honestly be walking in a month. I don't think Beckham will be far behind. We have our 9 month check up on Friday. I can't wait to see how much they have grown. Hopefully they are out of that 4th percentile!  Oh I almost forgot.  We tried pasta and cheese puffs this weekend.  They loved it!  I can't believe it's time for big boy food.  It scares the crap out of me, but I'm slowly adjusting. 




Big Boy Brody



Sweet Little Beckham



Hang on Bubba