Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Five Years

I had a friend email me the other day asking if she could run a mile in a marathon in memory of my angel.  I was so touched that there is someone out there that still remembers too.  That someone else out there knows that we have a child in Heaven.  It prompted me to start thinking back on the past 5 years and I started reading some old blogs.  It was a very dark and lonely place to be in that season of my life.  So much pain and heartache.  Little did I know I would be typing this 5 years down the road in one of the best places I've ever been in my life.  I have three beautiful boys and I'm happy.  I am so grateful for my journey and I wouldn't change it.  Infertility changed me, but for the better.  I'm a better mom, wife, Christian and friend.  I wouldn't give any of that up!  GOD IS GOOD!

This Thursday will be five years since we heard our angel baby's heartbeat for the first and last time. I can remember how exciting that day was. After 18 months we were finally on our way to having our baby. Little did we know that was not going to be the case. I spent 12 weeks of pregnancy (really 8 weeks) with that child. Planning names and nurseries. Doing all the things that pregnant people do. That baby is and will always be a part of us and our family. He/She is in Heaven and I can't wait to meet him/her. I just wanted to take some time to acknowledge that I still remember it all so well and to say that I still miss my angel. 

1 comment:

Mrs. D'Amico said...

Not that you're seeking advice but I wanted to share that you should read Randy Alcorn's book called Heaven. It's so amazing... it helped me heal (even after all the years) with picturing and longing for heaven and seeing Chloe again. It talks about miscarriages, infants, babies, children that are young etc and it's all scripture based. It's long and heavy in theology but it's so amazing. :)

"Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. John 9:3